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Published September 23rd, 2003 | by Johan De Silva

Gigli Review

The wedding has been cancelled but the box office hasn’t and so comes the release of the first of two collaborations for Affleck and Lopez. After several unsuccessful films and two failed marriages J-Lo needed to pull out a stonking good film and secure a stable relationship to avoid being Jenny from the flops. This film delivers her neither as it would seem her judgement in picking work is equally as dodgy as her ability to find a lasting leading man. Believe all you’ve heard about Gigli, it is a truly dreadful film.

The plot follows as such: Gigli (Affleck) is a hitman hired to kidnap ‘psychologically challenged’ Brian (played very convincingly by Justin Bartha), the younger brother of a federal prosecutor who is about to put away a mob boss. The job however becomes long forgotten when Gigli sets his eyes on hitwoman Ricki (Lopez) who has been bought in to watch Gigli on the job. But alas Ricki can never be his as she, shall we say, hits for the other team. And so ensues all manner of cringeworthy scenes and a terrible script.

Unlike other Hollywood bombs before it, such as Showgirls (which had a camp tongue in cheek tone), Gigli is often offensive and stereotypical. Meathead type Gigli is the ringleader in calling Brian a retard and generally abusing the defenceless boy. Disability is an issue seldomly discussed in Hollywood, and to see it used as a point of comedy isn’t the exposure it needs. As is also the case with sexuality in the film. According to Lopez’s (I’m sure very well-researched) depiction, being a lesbian constitutes wearing several turquoise rings and constantly reading a book. But put the right amount of bone headed testerone in front of any women and down come the defences and out come the seductive yoga moves. In Chasing Amy , another Affleck rom com which threw up similar sexual questions, sexuality is more convincingly dealt with as a mercurial part of the human make up. In Gigli it is merely as an excuse to show that all lesbians need is Ben Affleck.

Shockingly, it’s not just the two leads that will be pulling their careers from the box office carnage. Hollywood Class Christopher Walken and Al Pacino both wonder onto the screen in what we can only imagine as a horrible mistake of them being pointed onto the wrong set. Walken in particularly looks very lost and makes a sharp harp exit.

Gigli is a film that will move people. That is off their seats and out of the cinema. Or as also in my experience to talk on their mobile phones. This is a film that should only be seen by masochist cinema goers.

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